raid on the city!!

[forprofit]

[Hello, fellow Rockets and general wrong-doers! You may or may not recognize this man in his dashing white uniform and red insignia wandering around the plains, seemingly searching for something or someone. He's had a long enough while to get more familiar with this place, so now he's in an exploring mood. Maybe there's a nicely furbished abandoned building around here he can claim...

There's a sharp-looking Houndoom next to him, but that aside, he looks pretty harmless - unless you're a hat-wearing kid with too many morals. He might be up for chatting.]

Comments

[forprofit]

[Archer has made himself prepared for many possible outcomes in life but he is so not prepared for this.

However...a legit talking legendary of all legendaries would be worth all the currency in all the regions combined. Does he even have something better than a pokeball? Note to self: order supply of ultra balls as soon as possible.]

[relaxceus]

[Eventually, they pull out a rug that seems to be familiar.

It's... a pretty ugly rug.]

That's all I wanted, man. That's all I wanted.

[He turns and-- oh.]

Oh, you're-- well, that one.

[Awkward...]

Hey there little dude.

[forprofit]

[Sorta awkward. But Archer is good at playing along.] Are you having trouble picking a rug?

[relaxceus]

Nah, some nasty types mistook me for someone they were actually gonna, ya know, bother. Whatever, man, I can't tell 'm much about life and good and stuff, I just wanted my rug back.

[forprofit]

[Is the creator of literally everything supposed to talk like this...?] It might be easier to simply take it.

[relaxceus]

What... oh yeah, you're that kind of little dude. Nah, man, I can't be throwing my weight around all the time... I can't tell people what to do or how to be. They gotta just be.

I didn't wanna have to break the store apart to fit inside, I know they gotta make a livin', too. Ain't fair for me to disrupt their natural life cycle and all that.

[forprofit]

But you could disrupt it, right? [Would a pokeball work? What are the chances again? Eh, probably not...]

[relaxceus]

Yeah, but then shit gets crazy, my bitty bud. Heck, the world I made with all the leftover laws-of-reality is a total crazy mess, ain't no wonder that almost nothing survived there. Except trees that can grow sideways or upside-down.

Though technically there's no "up" or "down" or "left" or "right". I need to be more careful.

[forprofit]

[Actually, scratch all plans, he probably doesn't want to capture this one. What is this about trees...?] But surely that wouldn't affect you.

[relaxceus]

There ain't much that can affect me, man. But bam, all this life sprouts up, and after the initial cultivating... I can't get involved.

That's just how it gotta be. Like, I can't tell you that you're wrong, in the end you're just trying to do what you think is right. You are wrong, but I'm not helpin' anyone by telling you what to do or how to be.

[forprofit]

[oh.] You know who I am? No - you naturally would, wouldn't you.

[relaxceus]

Yeah, I do. Archer, I think you go by. Or Apollo? No, that depends on which world, dang, I can't quite tell which hand your world rests on.

[forprofit]

[Wow. The creature know his stuff after all.] Apollo was an undercover name I used in my earlier days...

[relaxceus]

[Indeed! And yet with all that knowledge, he is just happy to have a freshly cleaned rug sitting around his neck.]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, darn, can't remember your birth name. Not like you ever did or will do anything important with that name.

[forprofit]

I feel confident enough to handle my life just fine.

[relaxceus]

I mean, whatever, man. I can't tell you how that's gonna work out for you either way, prey animals can't know that the predator's gonna get them and all. Predator's gotta eat, and all that.

[forprofit]

You can spare me from your concern and pointless analogies. I know what I need to do.

[relaxceus]

Do what you gotta do, little brother. Everything's set in place for the ideal outcome.